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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23966194">Where Loyalties Lie</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/LyraWrites/pseuds/LyraWrites'>LyraWrites</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>One Man's Darker Time Line Is Another's Salvation [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe, Dark James Potter, Death Eaters, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Severus Snape Redemption</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-05-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-02 16:35:28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,357</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23966194</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/LyraWrites/pseuds/LyraWrites</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Some points in time are set; some are not. The Dark Lord must rise. James Potter's house sorting? Up to fate's hands. In a world where James Fleamont Potter was sorted in Slytherin which time points are kept and which change? This series explores James Potter's unhealthy co-dependence and relationship with Severus Snape, their years at Hogwarts, the war and even his relationship with his son. </p><p>This installment: January 1981 James has gotten wind of Severus' potential disloyalty to their cause and things come to a dramatic impasse between the two. But will James be able to let Severus go all that easily?</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>James Potter/Severus Snape</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>One Man's Darker Time Line Is Another's Salvation [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1727863</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>112</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Where Loyalties Lie</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>James frowned as he watched his best friend of 13 years come into the room. He made the appropriate warding and privacy spells and asked for him to sit. Whatever happened tonight needed to stay between them.</p><p></p><div>
  <p></p>
  <div>
    <p>"Severus, drink." He ordered passing the goblet over the table.</p>
    <p></p>
    <div>
      <p>Severus sniffed and stiffened. "Veratiserum? What's going on James?"</p>
      <p>"Don't James, me. You are lucky it's just me tonight. I stopped Avery from opening his big mouth and escalating this."</p>
      <p>Severus spun the goblet, "I have no idea what you mean" he said coolly. "Whatever I am doing is for our cause. Whatever you need to know, you know. The Dark Lord is specific about this James."</p>
      <p>"Drink. It. Severus. Before I imperio you." He didn't want to, but what choice did he have?</p>
      <p>"James..."</p>
      <p>"DRINK IT!"</p>
      <p>He watched Severus down the concoction. "It's not full strength?"</p>
      <p>James grimaced, "potions never was my strong suit." This was not entirely true but he wanted to spare his friend some privacy, however it was strong enough to make sure he couldn't outright lie.</p>
      <p>"James, what's all this about? What's happening?" Severus said with concern ripping at his soul. It hurt him to do this but the truth may hurt even more and he needed to know.</p>
      <p>"Are you a spy for The Order of The Pheonix?" He asked calmly on the surface but his belly felt like it was swarming with snakes.</p>
      <p>Severus gave him an incredulous look. "This has been kept from you for a good reason-"</p>
      <p>"I'm not talking about working as our spy, I mean are you theirs! Are you their spy?!"</p>
      <p>"James, I'm not supposed to tell you- you could get in deep shit." Severus said testily.</p>
      <p>"Don't you play games with me, Severus. The cat is out of the bag, question is are you on my side or hers!"</p>
      <p>"This again! James Potter, how many times do I have to go over this?! I'm here with you aren't I?"</p>
      <p>James threw a knife at Severus and kept himself from wincing as it sliced Severus' hand.</p>
      <p>"What the fuck, James?!" Severus cradled his hand.</p>
      <p>"Yes or no, Severus. You know I could do a lot worse than this." He prepared his wand and pointed it at Severus. "Don't make me, friend." His voice was steel. After everything they had been through together he didn't want to believe it, but he couldn't get Avery's words out of his head. He could see it all too well.</p>
      <p>"Merlin's left ball! James, I'm by your side and I always want to be on your side! Why must you always doubt me?! I was not the one to leave! I have always been true to what I have said to you. Is it not enough that I chased after you like a lovesick puppy in school but I must degrade myself to this interrogation to prove myself to you? You aren't my superior, James no matter what you thought in school." Severus slammed his unhurt hand and got up, "I'm moving to the bathroom to get some bandages, follow me if you think it's necessary," He hissed.</p>
      <p>James equally riled, took his advice. "Don't get high and mighty with me Severus! Why were you talking with Evans? Avery saw you two getting chummy. Just like the good old days, aye Severus? Just you and the mudblood? Surely the Dark Lord has nothing planned for her!"</p>
      <p>Severus' step faltered before continuing on his way. "Yes, he has nothing planned for her but I'm supposed to make my position at the Order believable. Are you so dense that you cannot put two and two together?!"</p>
      <p>"So of course you had to start with Evans!" He snarled back. Severus had a gift for distraction and he wasn't going to fall for it.</p>
    </div>
    <div>
      <p>"The one person I had a deep connection in the past yes." Severus responded his tone reflecting his unimpressed manner as opened up the bathroom cupboard to find a salve.</p>
      <p>"Severus, she is dangerous! I forbade it for a reason!" He found himself waving his arms around wildly but he didn't care.</p>
    </div>
    <div>
      <p>"I'm not a child, James! You cannot forbid me to do anything!" He huffed blowing his hair from his eyes as he worked the salve. James tried to suppress multiple fond memories of Severus and he over a cauldron. Severus always had a tendency to blow his hair rather than stopping whatever he was doing to fix it. </p>
    </div>
    <div>
      <p>That was a memory to indulge in later. For now he had to make sure Severus was okay and not lead down the fairy path by a red-headed siren. "You know what she does to you, Severus," James exclaimed, running his hair through his fingers. "She makes you question the Dark Lord, our cause and us!" He gestured between the two of them. "She is also sharper than you credit her for and she knows your mannerisms, if she discovers you are really with us, your cover could be blown!" At the thought James swallowed. "You could be killed!"</p>
      <p>At that Severus barked out a laugh. "If at any point any side believes I am with the other I can be killed." Severus' eyes met his in the mirror. "I was aware of the risks when I took the position James."</p>
      <p> He said this so quietly and somberly that James hugged him from behind. The image of that was too painful. He closed his eyes and just let him feel the movement of the other man's breath. There was a silence as he calmed. Feeling Severus like this always centered him. Severus was the one person in the whole world that could make him fly off the handle and think clearly at the same time. He was quiet Sunday mornings and rowdy Friday nights all at the same time. Their bond had lasted 13 years and was unlike anything James had ever experienced. It was a stupid that he had to let Severus go to understand that for a couple of years ago, but James was making it up to him, no, to them, now. It was why James threatened Avery to keep his mouth shut, despite jeopardising his position within the Death Eaters. Severus was his to protect, he knew that the first day of school and as long as they were together, they were okay.</p>
    </div>
    <div>
      <p>Oh, what was he doing tonight? "I'm sorry I doubted you. I went a bit overboard. When I heard that you were talking to the mudblood, I had to know for sure."</p>
    </div>
    <div>
      <p>Sighing and bandaging himself up, Severus responded. "You are an idiot."</p>
      <p>"Hey! You are not supposed to really believe that!" James said, his chin finding Severus' shoulder.</p>
      <p>"Let me finish James, you are an idiot for doubting my feelings for you. I chose you over her 8 years ago."</p>
      <p>His arms tightened against the other man. They have only broached this subject carefully in the past, it was always a touchy subject and he hated that anyone had come in-between them and that it had an effect even now. People always called them co-dependent, but he learnt the hard way that it was just the way things were meant to be. He tried pulling away and he tried not to think about those times. "I know you did, old habits and all that..."</p>
      <p>Severus huffed again. "I should be the one questioning you. You were the one who chose her over me and have a son with her." He pulled away slightly but that only made James' grip tighter.</p>
      <p>"I know, my two years of weakness. I can't believe I spent the last year of school without you. I'm sorry. But I have no regrets in leaving her once I saw the truth."</p>
      <p>Severus waved his apology off. "It's the past, things have changed since then."</p>
      <p>James frowned, "I may have let the mudblood lead me astray but I am here now. I made my choice and I see that they are nothing but a blight amongst wizard kind."</p>
      <p>Putting a hand on his, to release James' grip, Severus turned so that he was facing James. "Your son is a half-blood, like me. Is that how you feel about us?"</p>
    </div>
    <div>
      <p>This was the question James had struggled with, and Severus knew it. His devotion towards the other man conflicted with his values, but he knew now where he stood and no one could convince him otherwise. "You maybe a half-blood, but you chose the side of right. And you won't be creating more half or mudbloods! Which is more than what I can say about The Order and their bedfellows! As for the boy..." he dug deep before responding, "The boy... is a mistake I would rather not think about... it maybe selfish of me. Maybe I should try to bring him to our side. I know he is half me and has great potential of the Potter line but mark my words, nothing good can come from him with a mother like her." He saw the other man nod curtly but before he could move away, James stopped the man by holding his hand. He knew something that he had said stung the man. He knew of Severus' own relationship with his father was...difficult to say the least. "Severus, you must know I would never knowingly harm the boy but he would only get in the way here! Who would look after him?"</p>
      <p></p>
      <div>
        <p>Severus didn't meet his eyes. "The boy never asked to be born, James. You made that choice for him, you promised to be there for him, for them both... you maybe a different person than a year ago, but your promises last a lifetime."</p>
        <p>James sighed a long sigh. "This is why I don't like you talking to her. You get turned around! Severus remember what you told me? 'Life is unfair, muggles will never understand us, they outnumber us a thousand to one.' Your own muggle father was filth, that's what they all are! That's how they see us! It's about survival. We have a right to not live in secrecy, in fear. Lily Evans wants wizards kind to remain under the boot of muggles and to pander to their whims. That boy is half that. Don't you see? You are a miracle, an exception to the rule."</p>
      </div>
      <div>
        <p>Severus looked at him with what James supposed was worry, or maybe discomfort, the veratiserum made Severus unable to hide his true emotions but that didn't mean James knew how to interpret it. Noticing James' puzzlement Severus cast his eyes away from James, so James squeezed his hand. "Severus, I know you are doing important work for the liberation of our kind. But I beg of you, keep your distance from Evans and the boy... I can't bear to see you pushed and pulled."</p>
      </div>
      <div>
        <p>To his delight, Severus returned the squeeze. "It feels like 5th year all over again, or was it 6th? Ah, it doesn't matter. I know you doing what you think is right for me." Severus still couldn't meet his eyes. James brought his chin forward forcing the other man to look at him. James loved the other man's eyes, deep pools of black that you could get lost in. Many people found it hard to read, and therefore unsettling but James had found them mesmerising.</p>
      </div>
      <div>
        <p>There was a heat between them, a closeness and vulnerability that was opened over the course of the evening and he found himself closing the gap between them. Merlin, it was such a long time coming. He wetted his lips and connected his to the other man's. It was gentle and tender, his hands found themselves tangling in the inky pools of hair. Soft. It had been just washed then.</p>
      </div>
      <div>
        <p>Severus broke them apart. "James, don't do this... I cannot repeat 7th year..." Once again, averting his eyes, and hiding his face behind his hair. He knew that Severus the boy had a crush on him, but always restrained because of Evans. But now it was time to break the illusion and the needless respect to her.</p>
        <p>James growled and forced his face to where he could see him. "I was an utter idiot in 7th year, too stupid to understand my feelings and to know how bloody brilliant you really are. It will be different this time. Just you and I. Don't let the past haunt us, together forever, right?" he asked tenderly.</p>
      </div>
      <div>
        <p>Severus nodded, looking every bit the timid kid James Potter fell in love with that day in Hogwarts but too young to realise. "I want to be with you... Always."</p>
      </div>
      <div>
        <p>The confession made his heart soar. He kissed Severus again and put his 13 years of feelings into one kiss. To his joy, Severus returned the kiss with vigor. James' heart soared. This was it. It felt so right and he kicked himself for waiting so long. what had he been waiting for? Without breaking their lip lock, hands roaming everywhere, James quickly moved them to the bedroom, where they made even quicker work of their outer robes.</p>
      </div>
      <div>
        <p>The night was so perfectly spent that in the morning as James stretched out he thought nothing of Severus' absence from his bed. He would have loved to wake up next to him but he guessed that Severus was making tea as he always did on Sunday mornings. It was a perfect Sunday. James closed his eyes and imagined a world where they brought order to the wizarding society, where they had a few pureblood surrogate children of their own. One for the each of the to continue their lines, maybe a Black? James shooed that thought away, he didn't want any child of his to be related to that waste of a wizard Sirius Black. Maybe a Greengrass then? The details at this stage weren't important, they were happy, fighting for a world they believed in and when they won, it will be a beautiful peaceful world.</p>
      </div>
      <div>
        <p>Before he could continue those thoughts, in mid-musing he noticed that the usual hustling bustling noises where lacking. He frowned, sat up and put on his glasses only to notice a note on his side of the table. His heart dropped. Could the Dark Lord have requested a mission of Severus already?</p>
      </div>
      <div>
        <p>The note read as follows:</p>
        <p></p>
        <div>
          <p></p>
          <div>
            <p>
              <em>James, I love you. You know that I have for a very long time. I think I have ever since our first day at Hogwarts. I'm sorry I never got to say the words aloud. I am a coward and always have been, so I find myself writing you this letter instead. </em>
            </p>
          </div>
          <div>
            <p><em>Over the past couple of months I have been questioning everything the Dark Lord stands for, what we are doing, and mostly to the degree in which we are doing things. I find myself unable to continue our cause. Last night I wanted to take you with me, but it is clear we are in two minds in this matter. I still want equality between the muggles and ourselves, I want the system to change but I cannot justify the cost. We have to stop, the world you are imaginging doesn't exists without the suffereing of others... and I can't accept that anymore. I know you know the trigger for my thoughts but maybe not in its entirety.</em> <em>I suppose that Avery did not let slip that I met him, James.</em></p>
          </div>
          <div>
            <p>
              <em>I met Harry. He's still a Potter and he is perfect. Half-blood and all. He looks just like you when you were that age (I have disclosed a picture </em>
            </p>
          </div>
          <div>
            <p>
              <em>for you). When I saw that boy that was so perfectly you, I knew he deserved people that love him, who will nurture him, whatever his blood status. Screw, 'life is unfair' James. We can make it fair.  I looked to Lily and I saw a mother confused and distraught. She was wearing herself down. I  knew she wouldn't survive this war without help. I saw history repeating. A negligent father; a mother unequipped to go it alone. I couldn't leave them. The world is a scary place for them and Harry has done nothing wrong. I hope you understand and can forgive me for it one day and that you stay safe. </em>
            </p>
            <p>
              <em>I love you, I love you, I will love you James Potter to the day I die. </em>
            </p>
            <p>
              <em>Always yours,</em>
              <br/>
              <em>Severus Snape. </em>
            </p>
            <p>James read the note, re-read it, and re-read it willing for the contents to change and when it didn't bow to his will, he roared and threw the letter and the photo that he didn't dignify himself to look at on the floor. He tipped the night side table and everything on and in it spilled over, clanking and crashing as it tumbled. When this did not sate him, he hurled everything from the walls on to the floor uncaring of its value. When he saw a framed photo of his school days with Severus he not only threw it to the ground but stepped on it, crushing the photo until it was illegible. Lies, lies! It was all lies!</p>
            <p>He knew it! He knew it! He chose that mudblood and her son over him. And what was worse he let James open up, give everything he had and still decided to leave him. A sob was wrenched from him. He chose the boy over him! How could he?! He wasn't even related to the brat. He found that he couldn't stop sobbing. Oh it hurt! It had hurt so much! He scrambled for the note and clutched it to his chest. He read the last three lines over and over again. How can Severus claimed to have loved him and then leave him?! He punched the wall which cracked under the force. What was so special about the boy? Why was he, James, abandoned and the boy with Severus. He turned, went for the photo and looked at it.</p>
            <p>He felt anger, hurt and disgust when he saw the photo of the happy gurgling child. It was like he was mocking him. He crumpled it in his hand. He saw nothing of himself in the boy. It was all their fault. The mudblood and the boy! The mudblood used their past and a baby to lure Severus into their side. She was always wily that one. And Severus with his bleeding heart fell right into her ploy. He wasn't going to give up! If that mudblood bitch wanted a fight, he will bring the fight to her! She will beg for her life to end by the time he was done with her. He will tear her limb from limb, stitch her back together feeling every needle prick, and do it again and again. Fueled by abandonment and betrayal, he knew what he had to do. If the boy and his mother was destroyed, then he could have Severus. Simple, the letter said as much. </p>
            <p>He heard of mutterings that the Dark Lord was looking for children around the boy's age and time of birth. It wouldn't take much to convince his master that he will need to remove the brat and his mother from the equation. Had to make certain that the prophecy could not become a reality. Really this was fate leading their cause in the right direction. He could convince his master to spare Severus for his good service and with a little more time with him, James knew Severus could see right again. Oh Severus, James knew he had a soft heart buried within him. He was always the one who felt it more when the Marauders picked on him, always moodier when their headmaster favoured his precious Gryffindors over Slytherins, always the one who came to James for comfort after a hard day of interrogating muggleborns. Severus always had struggled when it came to Evans side and his. Now it was up to James to rescue him. James took a deep breath in and exhaled out. His sense of the world now righted, it made sense.</p>
            <p>Now he can get to work. </p>
          </div>
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  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This idea took me hostage and wouldn't let me go, even though I was so uncomfortable writing it!! The series will eventually have a happy end... but you have to ask, happy for who? Please let me know your thoughts in the comments below and leave Kudos if you enjoyed reading and want to see more in the series.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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